How Your Divorce Affects Your Friendships
Posted on April 06, 2012 by Dishon & Block
Dishon & Block: Divorce Advice
If you’re thinking about getting a divorce, your head is most likely spinning with a million questions, but one question that often pops up is this: What impact will this have on my friends?
Divorce often affects friendships in a way never imagined. Unfortunately, friends may take sides and this can be quite painful when these once-close friends or work acquaintances turn and run away as if you had just contracted a deadly disease.
So, expect some bumpy friendship roads when you’re going through a divorce and your so-called friends just fade away without so much as a fare-thee-well. But how can you keep your friends without alienating them in the throes of a divorce or when its ended?
Stop complaining about your ex. Keep your criticisms about your ex at bay. If you’re constantly whinning about what your ex did or not did do and the “unfairness” of it all, people eventually become weary of listening to your long list of grievances and stop calling or inviting you out. They just don’t want to hear it anymore!
Be on guard of overly-friendly spouses or significant others. This gem should not be overlooked. Becoming too cozy with your friend’s spouse or significant other can lead to real problems especially when a spouse calls to offer advice or possibly something more. Keep your guard up and don’t get caught up in a situation you didn’t initate or ever contemplate in the first place. Be strong and say, “No thank you!”
Build a support system. You will know who your BFFs are, either girlfriends or close buddies. They are true friends who listen with a sympathetic ear to your hurt and pain. But just don’t keep talking about your ex to them. Make plans to do things that are fun; take in a girl flick or go to a sport’s bar to cheer your favorite team, set off on a hike or bike ride together. Plan a tapas party or celebrate a friend’s birthday! Fun times with good friends will help your sadness disappear and you’ll feel more in charge of your life.
Thank those who have stuck with you. You’ll know who your real friends are because these people will support and love you when you need it the most. So, don’t forget to thank them for their kindess and generosity, perhaps with a card, flowers or a gift they’ll really appreciate.
If you are already certain about getting a divorce, the first thing to do is to hire a qualified divorce lawyer. An attorney can give you the information you need to start the divorce process, including the best way to deal with your finances and how to protect your assests, child support and parenting arrangements.
Although this can be one of the most difficult times in your life, hiring an attorney with a support team can be the best thing you ever did for yourself.
This article was posted in Divorce Tips & Advice.
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